miseria-fortes-viros:

fuck dating apps i want to meet someone the old fashioned way (you’re walking your bike up the last hill into town wearing your school uniform. i’m hanging out the passenger side window of my best friend’s car. your hands are beautiful. we know nothing about each other. you disappear in the rear view mirror. i close my eyes and send up a simple, inexplicable, desperate prayer to god. i say please. i have never said please in my life)

shutupmerlin:

A series of events:

1. I put in an Annual Leave request form almost 3 weeks ago and my boss has not approved it yet

2. I went into my office today and replaced every single writing utensil with crayons in preparation for April Fools Day on Monday

3. Whilst searching for pens to remove, I found my unsigned Annual Leave form in my boss’s drawer

4. I placed my unsigned Annual Leave form in a photo frame and put it on his desk

5. The frame I used was from a photo of his kids that I deemed less important than my Leave form

6. My boss sometimes goes into the office on Saturdays to work

7.

image
Loading... No More Posts Load More Posts